I am just finishing up my generals at a community college and then I will go to a different college for 2 yrs once I decide my career. My problem is this: My boyfriend and I have been together for almost 4 years and we hope to get married within a year. I don't want to put off a family for school and work. I can't wait to have a baby and be a mom. So I am just kind of stuck because although I know I should wait until after college to have a baby, I really don't want to wait 2 yrs! And even if I do wait until after college, then I will just have completed college to be a stay-at-home mom. (Which I really hope to do) I hope to get into my career when my children are older and are going to school because I really don't want to send them off to daycare. So i kind of feel like what's the point of college if when I'm done, I have kids and stay home to take care of them?!
Pregnancy and college dillemma?
Umm, seriously, my boyfriend just read this question and pointed out it could have been written by me. I'm in the EXACT same situation. I'm planning on finishing college and getting a BA. I want to be a stay at home mom too, and I'm going to school for elementary education so it all sort of makes sense for me to have that background. I thought about it for a long time, and decided that I really want my kids to have two college grads for parents. My partner and I decided it was worth it for us to wait. After all, being married for another year or two is only going to help our relationship. After your kids are grown, you'll have your degree to fall back on. Good luck making the decision, hope I helped :)
Reply:if you want to have kids now, go to school later. They're are so many untraditional students these days. You should know since you go to a community college. If you want to have a baby go for it. You will be happier doing what you really want instead of what you think you should want.
Reply:stay in school- no need to deal with drool!
you want the best home for your child right? well then get an education so you can get a good job and provide for your baby in the best possible way.
Reply:Well....if you pursue a career will you be able to care for a child too? Or if you pursue children, will you be able to fit in a budding career? If you really want to have children...maybe you could start a career one or two days a week while they're growing?
I think we all know the answer to this one...wait to have kids. You have lots of time.
Reply:wow it seems you have got yourself pretty screwed up alright.
Reply:You can always get married within a year, do 1 year of school, get pregnant, and have the baby after graduation. That way you get both, and you are really only waiting about a year to get pregnant.
There are so many options now for college - online classes, weekend classes, satellite courses.. I do encourage you to finish. It will be so much harder to go back if you change your mind later.
Reply:I went to college after I had my kids..I never really wanted to go to school until my second child was born. I want to do something that will one day make them proud and something I can make money to pay our bills and still have hours left in the day to spend with them...and something so we wont be considered low income anymore....I am doing some online coarses. Its not easy watching my kids while working online. But its what I have to do. I also learned after I had my kids that the state will pay for most of my schooling. Which is very helpful! and I am so very thankful for! I am now looking into a college that actually provides day care, so I can attend class and be able to concentrate more.
Reply:If you really cannot wait to start a family, you have a few options. Either start you family, and maybe do an evening class for the moment. Start your family, and when they are old enough for school, you go to college then. or start you course now, and see how things go, you may not get pregnant straight away, and if you do, then you can sort it out with your college when to carry on with your studies when you have had your child. hope this advise helps you out a little.
Reply:Wait until your done with college. Imagine how hard it will be when your stressed out and in pain because of the pregnancy and at the same time you have an essay or something to do. That wouldn't be fun.
Reply:yes
Reply:If the marriage doesnt work out, youre screwed without an education.
As for having a kid, adopt. There are already too many humans on the planet.
Reply:An education is something that will benefit you for your entire life, whether you're a stay at home mom or not. Although having children seems appealing right now, it will be MUCH more difficult to go back to school once you are established in a way of life, especially if you have to work at the same time. My dad is finishing up his college degree right now as he works, and it has taken him so much time to do what could have been over a long time ago had he staid in college for just another year. I don't think you will regret staying in college and finishing your degree but it is possible that you will regret having children right now.
Reply:i tell u something if you have a baby right now it will change your plans for college i no its hard but its better to wait
Reply:well i dont recommend that you just forget about college. what if something happened to your boyfriend? what would you do? you wouldnt have anything to fall back on. i'm in college and i'll be a junior soon. i decided to start my family with my husband just recently and now im 10 weeks pregnant. i want to be a stay at home mom, but it's not like school takes up all my time. i decided to do day care for 3 days a week and be with the baby the rest of the time. i dont see anything wrong with that. or if you want even more time with the baby you could go to school half time (2 classes a week). that's only like 4-6 hours a week away from the baby. i think if you just forget about your career then your going to regret it. wouldnt you rather have the choice of following your career or staying a stay at home mom in the future? what if being a stay at home mom isnt all you think it will be? dont put yourself in a position where your going to regret your choice. i say go for the baby and stay in school.
Reply:If I were you, I would wait until you are married first of all. Then I would also wait until after college even though you don't really want to. I had a baby while in college and am still going to school and trust me it's WAY harder than you think. Just get school out of the way, then you can be a stay at home mom if you want, but not have to worry about getting school done.
Reply:wait until after college, you'll have plenty of time
Reply:go to school! You may find that you learn something more than expected that changes your outlook on your life.
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